in haiku.
Getting ugly gives me a headache. And it's just not my way. Doesn't really help anything anyway.
Turning cold, internalizing bitterness, it's a drag.
But here we go into a period of....
We have been here before on all counts. So I should just automatically be good at it right? Not so for me.
War mode doesn't come natural. It taxes my little everyday brain. I've thought of it like having other brains; like wearing different hats. Some mature brain that's "sophisticated" gets it. I intellectually understand that China considers Taiwan its possession. That makes my cat hair go up on my back.
Like an adult being mean to a child, it makes my stomach feel sick. My core brain yells at my other brains and disconnected body parts....like hey, ethical brain....you should stick up for the kid....yo mouth, keep it shut until you decide what you should do; how does joining the war help anything? Could it make it worse? Mean up and join in? Be something alternative? Just walk away? Comments about it to no one? Talk about the mean grown up behind their back? Why????? Philosophy brain wants to know. Why is that person an asshole? Why are some people and places thinking they can just own everyone and everything else?????
High road brain. Face getting a glazed look. This happens a lot. Instead of being a whole human being as the world gets uglier, I put the hurricane shutters on. I've made a cardboard replica of my real self. No mouth. No ears. No eyes. No feelings about brutes, taker overers, and assholes. Really.
Keep your mouth shut, my professional brain demands. Inside I'm rolling my eyes, my doolie brain says. If I said out loud half of what I'm thinking and feeling right now....maybe they'll only cut off half your head, some actor part of my brain quips.
Seriously though this is why people take extra time and effort to....what's the language of love and compassion? It's like when a co-worker lets ya know, around here we do this....It's not saying you are stupid or anything, but more like, this is an entity and so a we, and there's been a to-date, and somethings work better if we do it this way. It's not because the boss is an emperor, but....team! Success!
Oh yeah, it's all a process. And lits of decision-making. Pick your battles is what my mom told me about feeling my young adult freedom mixed with being a very disciplined person. There's power in being both free and responsible.
For all the criticism of media (and all its specific names) there is something important that happens in being able to get information. I think back to a spread of conflict during the 2001-2021 time period. It was morning shows on TV that had enduring ability to point out the subtleties of danger and keep a free and feeling people having a morning distinguished from the all-gray of war. And it was word getting out, how we knew...hikers taken prisoner, writers imprisoned, people like stalkers taking money to find and hurt people, online and in real life. All that was real. So a war footing wasn't just about hoarding money....it was how we navigate danger and stay alive as a nation.
I remember when....
We were sort of laughing at ourselves, our fashion choices, when we decided as a group to get out of a decade of dulldroms. There was a mass shift from fat ties to skinny ties. Years later we were overtly talking about red, blue, and purple ties representing poltical party. I knew guys who bought every kind of tie conceivable. And I knew artists who created ties.
In the overarching narratives about the world there are like ties that are signals, giving a head's up or some commentary. We can hear for example, that some places are being anti-democracy, anti-insert nation. And there are changes in rhetoric and action. Right now we are group-talking about changes due to leadership influence on people; and we are talking in broad ways about differences.
This morning I heard much being packed into the suitcase of "bipartisan support". And heard that the broad entity, the EU, is getting flak for sending condolences, showing sympathy to Iran for that country's death of a president. These are two larger group 'feet feeling under the waves for non-watery ground'.
This has been happening in workplaces too. Teams, companies try and set an appropriate tone. In business we are always trying to makes sales, satisfy customers, keep staff well, stay on budget with expenses and profits. It's ongoing.
What r u doing?
What r u doing?
Between the every angle of a person being surveilled including the nose picking and wedgie adjusting and the extraordinary righteousness of "owners" of place and duty....I feel like, that's not a question that should be harped at an individual.
I've saved some newpaper articles over the years and I practice-write responses. Today I'm trying to get my head in gear with "Israel is its own 'closest' ally" by Dr. Harold A. Black, printed in a newspaper called, The Knoxville Focus.
Undisclosed? Naw. Just another still pkng lot waiting to go to work. Hoping I make enough tips-as-wage to warsh my uni.
Will write in periodically, nothing official. Just another made-in-china scented sun bathing beauty for the summer. 24 all over again.
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